A Loving Kiss Makes it all Worth it

So I'm back after a couple days. My Dad let me in on a little courtesy hint. I should've left a little note making aware that I would be gone for a couple of days. My apologies and not to worry, everything is beautiful. I was at my Grandma's house for a couple of nights. I actually call her Nanny so that's what I'm going to call her from here on out. I spent a night at her place last week, as well. It's a pretty good thing that's going on. When I am unable to make it into to town the next morning, I stay at my Nanny's. Trust me, she loves it. She didn't really have a chance to baby me growing up because I lived in Sarnia; she in Toronto. Does she ever take advantage of me being around now. You know that I'm not going to say anything and take that away from her. When I moved to Brampton, while still practicing my addiction, I very rarely called her, let alone visited her. I think I went to her place once for Thanksgiving with my Mom. Whenever I did see her, during holidays (not all though), she would voice her lack of appreciation for me not calling. I couldn't get mad or talk back for two reasons. One, she's my Nanny. Two, and most importantly, I knew that she was right and that I was being a neglectful grandson, simple as that. That's the thing while deep in an addiction. I always felt that I was alone, especially I my darkest moments. It was never true though. My family, even my friends, that love me and always have were never given a chance to love me. I took myself out of the rays of their love to shit in my darkness of despair. But not more! I am now getting a love-tan, yes I know, cheesy, but that's what happens when you're filled with a new-found love and appreciation. Ha! A love-tan...I just made myself laugh. Alright, back to my stay at my Nanny's. Last week, Nanny's grace was all about me. She was very thankful that I was there for super and the night. Also, my jeans were very dirty and she didn't want me to waste money on the washing machine for one pair of jeans. We did it old school, the way she using to wash cloths growing up, in the sink (minus the washboard). It's those types of things that make me type cheesy things like love-tan. Yesterday, I mentioned that it was a sweet deal that we have going on. That we are having more opportunities to spend time together. Her smile matched how I felt inside. Just sitting there watching the news and wheel of fortune was enough for me. Dinner after work, coffee in the morning all added to my continued effort at this, once frightful and impossible, thing called sobriety. Wow, was I missing the boat! I actually fell asleep before ten last night. This is the clincher here: after I fell asleep and as Nanny was going to bed she startled me out of my sleep...with a kiss on my forehead. I smiled and said, "thank you, Nanny I love you." That loving kiss will never be forgotten and will be a guiding light if I ever find myself in the darkness that comes with the thoughts of trying out my past again. Well worth it!