Title: Valentine's Day Special - Friendship Factor addition

What a great day today is, isn't it. The great Valentine's Day. A day of love. Yes, some may dread this day. Singles, men who've don't know what to get their partner, people who've been hurt on this day, and many more may prefer to hide quietly until this particular 24 hours pass. Me, we all well know that I'm under the single category. We all know that I have, at times, become impatient over this status. It's not my time yet. I understand that, it's all good. In the meantime, I am getting to know myself without the influence of anyone else's personality, values, and persuasions. I am continually developing my own without making any concessions. Day by day, I am becoming my own man. Day by day, I am becoming more solid in my thoughts, views, preferences, and ideologies. The more solid I become, the less I care what others are thinking. That, my friends, was a massive problem with me. Don't get me wrong, it's still there. It's just less and less. Besides, I heard someone say whatever someone is thinking or thinks of you is none of your damn business. I'm not sure if I've shared that before, but "meh" I've shared it again.
I've gone through life with many female friends. Some of them, I wanted much more from the relationship. I've racked my brain long and hard over this "friendship factor" dilemma. I've hated those situations for a long time. I wondered why. One glaring reason, could very well be that I was tolerable (to some) as a friend while I was blindly living my drunken life of irresponsibility and selfishness. What's become apparent though, was with the lovely ladies that did give this "exciting and funny" (at times...usually the beginning) a shot at a more intimate relationship eventually realized that it wasn't a fantastic idea to live the rest of their lives with this loose-cannon of a man-child. Really, I didn't allow it to continue as I've shared before with my not-so-appropriate behaviour. What happened with a few of them is that we don't even have a friendship anymore. This is exactly where my focus shifts to a positive tone. I realize that if I didn't fall into the friendship mode with some of these fantastic ladies, it's very probable that they would NOT be in my life today. So instead of being perhaps bummed out or always wondering what could've been I, now, am forever grateful of how life has unfolded with my female friendships. Here's the thing, that "friendship factor" has unbelieveably great consequences for me. I am confided in with certain problems that arise. They want a man's point of view with things. As a natural trade-off, in waiting for my unique male point of view, I hear and listen to their issues, their feelings, and their points of view. What happens is that I gain a better understanding of people, in particular, the wonderful woman. This better prepares me for being partner in the future. Yes, everyone's different, but it's better than nothing and living ignorrantly. Sure, I'll still make some mistakes in the future, but I'll avoid some, as well...BOOYAH! Before I end on this section, I'll share this well-known quote...

"Behind every great man there's a great woman."

I thought of that yesterday (no, I don't mean made it up...HA!), in fact, and wanted to find out more about the quote. In doing so, I found an even better quote....I'll get to it in a minute. A few of you know that I feel that I am very far from my potential and that great things are destined for me. I know its not too humble, but it's something that's there and I doubt will ever go way until I achieve what I am supposed to. I don't know when it will happen, but it will. Alright, back to the quote...as said, I found an even better one.

"They said, behind every great man there's a great woman, while I'm not great a man, there's a great woman behind me." -Meryll Frost.

You see, I'm not great yet, but I have a beautiful advantage of having not just one great woman behind me, but many acting as a great multiplier in motivation, love, and support in my life's successes and journey. You know exactly who you are and I don't have to say your names. I must say thank you to you; family and friends of the lady persuasion....from raising me while young and as an adult to being a friend with the worst of me and best of me. I love you and Happy Valentine's Day.

So, on to what Valentine's Day means to me as a sober single. One, it's not a reason to get all bent out of shape for not having a loved one to share it with. A little secret (well, not anymore) is that I do have plenty of loved one's to share this day and my love with; family, friends, and even people that I may not be too particularity fond of, and vise versa. I spent the majority of my Valentine's morning texting the people I care for, letting them know that they are in my thoughts. Would I be doing this if I was all hungover? Nope! Would I be doing it if I was drunk? Probably, but it would be genuine as it has been today. I wouldn't be feeling the true nature of who is in my life and the effects that they have on me on the inside. Let me create a visual. Who can picture me smiling? Well take that, and imagine me doing that while texting and receiving text. Imagine me, by myself without having anyone around me physically, smiling. No comedy is being watched...just me smiling because of the thoughts of my peoples. I said I was by myself, but that's not entirely true. I have my loved ones close to me. You are in my thoughts. You are in my heart. You are around me in spirit.
With all this in mind, how could I ever feel lonely on Valentine's Day? You know what, it really just dawned on me that this can go for any day. Any day that I feel myself. Sometimes, I just need to be inspired to see things differently. Today, I am inspired. Loved ones, this is another day that change has occurred; another turning-point. Not another moment or day do I allow myself the excuse of feeling lonely...not anymore.

One more thing...Happy One Year Jeff. I know you'll be reading this, Brother. I am glad that we came into each others' lives when and where we did. I feel blessed to have your on-going support, kind words, brotherhood, and love in my life. Give yourself a pat on the back. You finding and remaining with God, being there for your family and others, me included, has kept you grounded and on path during this journey. Here's to many more years for us!

"A Friend may well be reckoned as the Materpiece of Nature."
-Ralph Emerson Waldo